Once an illegitimate
by kdlovehg
Summary: If memory is pure, then Peeta will always remember the face of the person who betrayed him. And if it damaged her so badly, then why is she on his doorstep? Or better yet, how can he get her to stay there...


Peeta's pov

If one peered out my window they'd see many fascinating things. The sun as it rises each morning casting a glow onto the streets below. The leaves and trunks of the trees that offer support and shelter for squirrels and owls and the occasional runaway cat. And the end of my six month relationship. Thankfully.

Its only fitting that such a high maintenance woman would make an issue out of an end. A fix to our - my problems should be a cuase of celebration. Then again, she was always overtly dramatic. I pinch the bridge of my nose and breathe in deeply. Its only just passed seven in the evening. In the distance I can hear the rocking of carriages and carts led by horses clopping along through the snow as they depart, no longer carrying food or decorations for me. I lower my hand and glance out again, trying to focus on the fire lanterns that float, unable to rise any higher, beneath a stone archway connected to a hallway that leads up to the house. Why did I waste my time?

Four hours ago I'd returned from a trip in the Capitol and the moment I'd stepped off the hovercraft I was bombarded with messages from the men who'd been waiting for me, telling me that Glimmer wanted me to go straight to my country house rather than find a drink and a place to relax for an hour or two. The whole purpose - she had a surprise for me. Now I don't hate surprises, I never have, but surely a short delay wouldn't be that disastrous, because generally people care about the suspense leading up to the discovery. No-one wants to be rushed into it, with red eyes and no sleep. Especially when I already knew that I didn't plan to continue my journey with Lady Glimmer.

In the past, she seemed perfect. On paper at least. She was known as a beauty around town, well-bred and she had money to her name. Not to mention she knew my sister, Primrose, who'd set up our first encounter. Then I got to know her, and I realised perfection depends on perspective. I'd not been looking for... romance, but the Lady gave me something to do with my time. Why deny that? It just, didn't work out.

She was very dominant compared to myself and whilst I don't mind letting another control the relationship, I don't think I should have had to meet her every need like a servant whilst the majority of mine went ignored. In all honesty, I think its clear that she acted the way she does because that's the way society taught her to as a single child, but that doesn't mean I liked it. People can change, even in their late twenties. She just didn't want to. Still doesn't. And I don't appreciate the tantrums she throws when I disagree with her, or the non-stop messages she made my men deliver to me.

I think I did well given the situation but she always wanted my attention. I'd given her access to some of my finances like she'd asked, but she didn't see anything wrong with using my money to buy frivolous items like jewellery that she'd only use as a decoration. It only was an issue when it was her money. To be fair, she'd tried to buy me something - with my wealth ironically - and she did. That was my surprise. She'd bought me an _engagement ring_. And she hadn't even proposed!

"Special delivery Peet" she'd exclaimed, using a nickname she'd created for me - one I'd told her to stop using numerous times. As I was so exhausted, it hadn't even occurred to me that the people and carriages weren't here to just drop off fresh produce, instead they were starting to decorate the rooms for the engagement party she'd arranged for tomorrow. "Its time we make this official" she'd say happily, dragging me along by my hands like a child. "Mummy and daddy are so excited and we know that if we get married in a month, I'll be pregnant before my birthday. Isn't that fun! They're so desperate for a grandchild and I'd like to wait but you're not very young, so clock's ticking", she'd state, despite the fact that I'm four years younger than her. "I'll be turning twenty-nine so we should get the first out of the way, and I know you're busy but its a yes. The ring's beautiful by the way and you should put yours on so the ladies stop looking at you in the way they do. Have you seen my necklace? We've been looking for a centrepiece".

I sigh and walk out of the room and towards the kitchen, passing the rows of remaining jewellery that were hung on the walls as a display. I'll have to find someone to remove the rest tomorrow. I need something to drink. How long does it take for an engagement ring to arrive? Glimmer left hers here as though she were the one breaking up with me but I haven't seen either of them. I didn't even give her time to show me what she had so I've yet to see them. Who knows what I'll do with them. I've no purpose for them but they were quite expensive. Maybe I'll save them? They must have been to her taste though.

Entering the kitchen, I wave Delly off, knowing she'd rather relax for the day then spend her time trying to return the room to its usual state. My housekeeper, simply nods in thanks. We don't speak much but we have a relationship that mirrors a friendship and not just one where she works for me, so we can communicate easily, and I know her lack of reply is her telling me that she understands my need for some time alone.

I smile when I notice the glass left on the counter, half-filled with alcohol. She knows me to well. I've no chance trying to relax my mind, when I'm sleep-deprived and sober. I don't plan on becoming an alcoholic, though the amount I've been consuming in the past few months has risen, but I appreciate that she looks out for me. I pick it up, glance at the sink and noticing a similar glass, I grin. Guess I'm not the only one who needed a drink.

I reach into a drawer and grab a napkin and pen. As I drink I write a note for Delly to read the next time she comes in.

 _Del_

 _\- One more delivery due and I'd be grateful if you left it for me to deal with. Please let me know when the messenger arrives and then you can return to going about your day. I'm in my office if you need me. Thank you._

Dropping the pen and the napkin back in the drawer, knowing she'll find it, I stroll into my office. I should be productive shouldn't I? I need to stop thinking about how Prim brought Glimmer and I together. How mismatched we were from the start. And how that'll probably be forgotten once lady Glimmer sends my sister a biased message about our breakup, before I even have a chance to write down a few words of my own. I've no time to waste pondering over the past or future. Neither matter anyway.

I close the curtains and shut the door, without turning on the lights. I need to relax. I take a sip, and then another. Despite the darkness, the light green wall behind my desk glows as though it's neon, brightening up the room somewhat like a nightlight would. I walk forward and collapse into the leather armchair before resting my elbows on the mahogany desk. The brutal carvings into the wood make me smile, even after all this time. Their memories don't allow me to forget her, instead they force me to remember the other woman. Glimmer. Oh lady Glimmer. You would have been so much more perfect if you hadn't touched what she'd left.

Mutt.

Enemy.

Liar. I slowly exhale.

 _Thief._

Twenty four months gone and it still isn't enough. I trace the patterns on the desk. I'd barely gotten away, in a narrow escape. But she's always here. Hunting me. Watching me. Preying on me.

She'd left me restless and confused about the path my life was taking. The role she'd play. How could she make someone so certain, question every permanent decision they'd have to make.

My hand clenches into a fist which I bang against the wood with a thud. I whip my head back to down the last of my whiskey. Forget it. Forget the colour of her hair and those manipulative silver eyes. And that horrid smirk that followed after every comment I'd made. I need to make sure I never forget what my real job is. That I won't be fooled again. When the ring is sent away I'll have one less problem. I won't have to face another disaster, or sleep beside one.

I glare at the cases of files opposite me and immerse myself in the work. To forget her. To forget what she did.

If only for a moment.

* * *

 ** _Authors note ~ Hi!_** _ **Loosely based off of - The secret Sanchez heir- book. I don't own the characters. Rights go to the right people. This is another new fic, I wanted to post this a while ago but our computers broken so...**_

 _ **Hope you guys liked this! Please review and tell me what you think! I love hearing your feedback! Thanks for reading. :)**_


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